If you're a regular reader of this blog and there are two of you (Hi mum!) you may have noticed a curious lack of postage, a dip in my presence in the Twittosphere, perhaps a little less fun in my funk. I feel like I owe you an explanation. This is because I am in the process of rebuilding my life and identity, one (occasionally tear soaked) day at a time, or in more recognisable terms - I am going through a separation.
I haven't written about this and won't again for a while because my son's father is one of those weird people who values his privacy but he has given me permission to post this because he is awesome and because I like to shout a lot about keeping it real and this is really happening. This is the realest.
I have struggled to keep up with regular programming because I have to prioritise being a mother and becoming a new formation of a family and doing a lot of adulting, so I'm here to let you know I'm back and for a while I'm going to be posting from the heart and without a plan because I now understand what they mean about the best laid plans. I will still be doing Mission Acceptance but because I'll be addressing a lot of personal stuff during my journey, I won't always write about it (these people and their healthy boundaries). The Mission Acceptance shout out will become The Moderate Mum newsletter and you will still get all the Mission juicy bits, access to giveaways and previews to the fun stuff I have coming up if you stay on board.
In the meantime, this much I know...
- People will make your separation about them
- You are still a family even when it doesn't look the way you imagined it would
- Some people just get it
- Some people don't get it and they are still wonderful to have around
- You don't know what's going on in a relationship unless you're in it and maybe not even then
- Soul mates are those that bring out the best you but the best you may need to live apart from them
- Being brave and feeling brave do not necessarily go hand in hand
- The children are always, always the most important thing
- When in doubt blast out some Beyonce
- Choose an amazing father or mother for your children and you will have done all you can do
- There are no right or wrong decisions, there are just decisions and the life you build after them
- Regrets I've had a few but then again too few to mention
- Your partner is probably taking care of a load of crap you aren't even aware of - thank them.
- No matter how old you are, when the shit hits the fan you will want your mum
- Children keep you connected and boy is that a blessing
- Don't it always seem to go that you don't know what you got til it's gone
- U2 had it right
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